Bitter, Party of One

I went for my walk today.  I didn't want to because it was dark by the time we got to it, but my little exercise coach would have given me major guilt if I hadn't. 

Then on the way home to drop off the dog so we could go grocery shopping, I realized how hungry I was and I didn't want to shop on an empty stomach.  We started thinking about the Debble - i.e. takeout food and I got into a huge argument with Steven.  I had finally decided on Wendy's, where I can have a pretty decent meal without going off my program, and he was insistant on another place. 

It just really upset me that I'm making all these sacrifices and my family can and does continue to eat however they want.  It's that old deprivation issue coming into play.  He wanted pizza or Long John Silvers or Sonic, and I had to be the strong one.

I hate being the strong one.

So I basically threw a hissy fit and now I'm sitting here, still hungry and very angry.  I wish this Journey meant as much to him as it does to me.  But like Dr. Phil said.  I gained it on my own.  I have to lose it on my own.

And maybe I feel a little guilty because I feel like I'm depriving them unfairly.  But they don't need that stuff anymore than I do.  Everyone in my family is overweight. 

I guess I just need the support in more than just words. 

Forgive the rant.  It comes with the territory of getting real with you feelings.  And it bites.  Seriously.

Exercise - Walked 1 mile

Dec Calories Spent 18,940 = 5.41lbs projected weight loss