"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
I got this from fellow weight loss blogger Lynne at : : The Art of Balance : : | DivaFlava.com and one thing really stood out at me. The comment, "Your playing small does not serve the world" really resonated with me. I can't count how many times I've backed away from potentially successful situations because deep down inside I feel like I don't deserve to be seen or heard, or that my contribution is somehow lacking simply because it comes from me.
I wrote a diary entry on my other website regarding my stance on religion http://www.geocities.com/duckebride/032904.html and how I feel that having such a staunch upbringing in a religion inevitably created in me the need to feel beat up. That's what I was taught. That we are all just lowdown dirty dog sinners who didn't deserve what God or Jesus did for us.
And that may be true. I may not deserve it - but I *AM* worthy of it. How can I make that statement so boldly? Because God deemed it to be so. He loved us all so much He created a path where we walk not by the measure of our deeds but the measure of His grace.
One of my favorite passages in the Bible is Romans 8:28-39. You might recognize this passage as the More than Conquerers passage. The word "conquerers" is very important. Not too many Conquerers are so mired in self condemnation that they shrink their life and their contribution to the world. There's humility, and then there's just stupid. It's not arrogant to stand in who we are, and who God created us to be.
God created us, and I don't believe He makes mistakes. So if that's true, if that passage is true, then who am I to shrink back from success as if I don't deserve it?
And maybe I don't deserve it. But I am *WORTHY* of it.
So from here on out I'm going to give myself permission to succeed. I'm going to give myself permission to be happy and to live my life completely, the way it was meant to be lived. Because that life is God's gift to me. What I do with it, is my gift to Him.
Calories: 2407* / 24% fat
(*went out to eat at Zookinis again, had a lowfat meal to enjoy the key lime pie... the pie took me over. I don't regret it though, like I said I'm still way under what I burned so no condemnation here.)