Yesterday was a bear. It seemed like whatever could go wrong or set me off did. I was presented with several opportunities to demonstrate what God's been teaching me. All issues have resolved thankfully, without me having a complete fit of carnality in the process.
If you haven't heard Jesse Duplantis' teaching on a Fit of Carnlity, you definitely should. It's a hilarious sermon on how to keep negative emotions with bad consequences at bay. God knows on most days I can use that teaching.
Yesterday gave me mannnnnnny opportunites. Most notably Timothy made the mistake of leaving the back door open and one of our critters got out. It wasn't on purpose, but after all the little things I was dealing with yesterday - it was the straw that broke the camel's back.
Thankfully the critter made it back home - Romeow had quite the adventure. My scroll mouse that gave me yet one more day of fighting my job (after internet problems the two days before) has now been replaced with an optical mouse. The rough patch that Steven and I hit yesterday seems to have been smoothed over, and so thank God I made it through the battlefield with only a few minor cuts and scrapes.
I did get the kitchen clean and the fridge is so clean you can eat off of it. I did one full load of laundry, then fizzled out on that. I did get all my auctions prepared no thanks to my demon possessed mouse. I even got a walk in even though the 94% humidity nearly knocked me out.
Today I'm presented with yet another opportunity - an interesting opportunity - to face a peculiar character trait. My inability to stay still. I'm always doing something, researching, searching, writing, working, doing. I rarely ever sit and be still. Sit and be quiet. Today is my first official "day of rest" and I don't know what to do with myself. I only have three things to do today. Spend time with God, spend time with family and to be still.
I don't have to exercise, even though I think I should. Today we could have gone for another walk (they're pretty painless if we go first thing in the morning), and I had to deal with NOT going.
I don't have to work, and I'm really jazzed about that. The last three days have earned me a day off.
I don't have to be anywhere near the computer - this is the toughy. I'm so used to having information right there when I want it. So it's not uncommon that I am never too far from the information super highway.
All I have to do is spend time with God, spend time with the family and be still.
I have to learn how to relax.
After my whole life of feeling like I have to work like a dog for anything and everything, this is hard for me. Even when I am not doing anything, I feel like I should be doing something. I mistake motion for progress much of the time.
So for me to take time and regroup and recharge is very uncommon. Yesterday I was working while the cartoons were on. I had to physically force myself to go sit on the couch and do nothing.
I always feel like I'm so far behind I have to do double time in order to catch up to where I oughta be. And generally I go off in fifty directions and get very little accomplished.
This is why I must learn to organize my life and my thoughts. So for me to get through the day without doing anything is going to be the challenge. Not to get ahead of myself, just take the day as it comes.
So far this has been productive for me. I have done more around the house, more at work and more with my family than I have done in a long time. In fact, my check should be about $200 more just from being structured and organized. I certainly have gotten more exercise done when I didn't even plan on doing any. Winston has gotten to the park more in the past week than he's been in the past month.
I know it's good for me. It's all a matter of creating new habits. Replacing what wasn't working with what is.
It's okay to take baby steps - I just need to learn to be still and enjoy the moment. The next step will come when it is supposed to. Right now, I'm just going to enjoy "being" rather than doing.
DAILY AFFIRMATION: I am worth relaxing and enjoying just being me.
June 26
Calories: 1915 / 22%
Water: 72oz
Exercise: Walked 1 mile
RED means I didn't meet goal
*Projected
2 comments:
I really enjoy reading your journal...you're doing a great job with your diet...
Hi Gin,
The hardest thing in the world for some women is to relax. They feel "guilty" if they take any time for themselves. I have clients that can barely make it through one hour for a facial. I do teach them though that in order to be an effective wife, mother, boss, worker, or whatever they see themselves as, they must relax to get the "insight" that God has for them. As you've said several times, baby steps. Sometimes an hour facial is a baby step toward longer rest periods. I can't figure out how anyone can not rest when someone is doing warm cleansers, warm water rinses, deep pore cleansers with steam, a 15 minute facial, neck and shoulder massage with warm (Aromatherapy) oil & beautiful music in a darkend room. Someday, I will have to give you a facial and see if you can't relax! ;) I will probably use the warm Lavender oil on you. It's pure essential oil and it's just heaven on earth. Ahhhh, I think I'll drift off somewhere .... hehehe.
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